“Oh, Lorelai Gilmore. You are one sassy, fast-talking woman,” I said to the TV one morning.

That's when I realized I had a bigger problem than I previously thought.

It all started when The Boyfriend realized we were living in Ye Olde Medieval Days, with only a handful of channels and no way of taping any of our favorite shows. So he made the executive decision to sign us up for Direct TV.

“That way I can record football and watch it when you're not around,” he explained.

Sounded good to me.

However, within a few days of installation, the DVR was suspiciously clear of sports — but filled with “Mad Men,” “What Not to Wear,” “No Reservations,” “Top Chef,” “Project Runway” and “The Soup.”

A few days later, the problem was remarkably worse. Shows I never watched before were suddenly filling up my DVR: “I Want to Work for Diddy,” “My Fair Wedding,” “The 650-pound Virgin,” “I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant.”

It's even started to invade my conversations. My openers now include, “So, there's this show called ‘Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew,'” and “Did anyone else catch ‘Styl'd' on MTV?”

I never watched this much TV before. But there's a dangerous combination to be had in a broken foot that keeps me laid up on the couch and a host of new shows at my fingertips.

It leaves me feeling giddy like I'm discovering moving pictures for the first time. Look at the talkies! How charming!

I try to justify it by saying at least I'm getting our money's worth. Besides, a DVR means I can fast-forward through commercials, which means I'm not really watching as much TV and it's not absorbing as much time. Kinda.

I know, just like any addiction, that this is bad news. My new TV habit means I have less time for real, meaningful experiences.

And so the adventures I used to have are now played out by “Gilmore Girls” and men who eat bizarre foods.

I hope as soon as my foot heals and the novelty of the DVR wears off, I'll return to embracing life outside the box.

In fact, maybe I'll even start tonight ... right after these messages.

Maggie Downs is a features reporter for The Desert Sun. She can be reached at (760) 778-6435 or maggie.downs@thedesertsun.com.